Greetings, Miss Manners I am currently receiving chemotherapy. When I’ve stated some side effects from chemotherapy when asked how I’m feeling on multiple occasions, I’ve been told, “Don’t you think that’s just your age?”
People do not typically experience these symptoms as they age. Why do people feel compelled to provide a different reason for someone’s negative emotions?
I once had to get up twice to use the restroom while eating lunch with friends. One of the people questioned me, “Do you have a problem?” when I went back to the table the second time.
Really! What’s wrong with humans?
PERSONAL READER: For starters, no filters. People feel compelled to speak up, even if it means keeping track of how many times they use the restroom.
However, Miss Manners admits that when there isn’t any genuine consolation to be given, there is also the less guilty tendency to provide consolation, not just pity. For this reason, the sick are inundated with fake positives and amateur medical advice.
Stories by
Judith Martin
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Greetings, Miss Manners When someone says they were going to gift you something, but… what do you say?
I have actually experienced two things:
1. My mother asked me if I was hungry when I got home. I prepared dinner for you, but I also ate it.
2. During lunch, I ran into a buddy who asked me if I had thrown a tea party. I considered inviting you, but ultimately decided against it.
It would have been preferable to say nothing in both cases. I wouldn’t have realized.
On both occasions, I remained silent. Miss Manners, what would she have said?
PERSONAL READER: Although I’m considering it, I probably won’t thank you.
Miss Manners can be reached by email at [email protected], via her website at www.missmanners.com, or by mail at Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
