To All Readers: I published a letter (People Pleaser) on January 12th from a first responder who was afraid of not doing therapy correctly, which made them reluctant to get treatment for PTSD and marital problems. In an effort to give the letter writer and anyone else having trouble deciding to get help some hope and encouragement, I wanted to publish the two responses to that letter that follow. You’re not by yourself.
To Eric, My son, who works as a first responder, was experiencing similar emotions. Luckily, he approached me and made a vague and informal reference to it. As a first step, I advised him to schedule a visit with his primary care physician. In the appointment, he underwent diagnostic testing and revealed that he suffered from anxiety and PTSD. I also think that by starting there, People Pleaser may acquire the resources they need to cope with these workplace challenges.
Second, my kid experienced the same dread of not being the best when it came to talking about his true feelings with friends, family, or workplace. He looked into first-responder group treatment in a nearby county, where he knew no one else. just as the doctor had instructed, and he found that he shared many of the same ideas and
issues as the other people.
Mom, a proud firefighter
To Mom: An excellent, private place to start is with your health care provider. Finding a support group is another great idea, especially one that is located outside of one’s house to ensure that social anxiety isn’t a roadblock.
To Eric, I have been a police officer for 22 years, have gone through a divorce, have a lot of memories I don’t want, and care about other first responders. About a year ago, my second wife and I came dangerously close to divorce, and we are still making every effort to move forward.
I was in a horrible place myself, wondering how I would support my family if I were no longer able to do so. In the end, I discovered a fantastic marriage counselor. I sought a therapist of my own, and my wife found her own. After breaking the seal, it was much simpler for me to finally talk about aspects of my past that I had vowed never to.
Naturally, I would advise PP to get treatment, but he should look for a counselor who has some first responder experience. Additionally, the letter writer ought to pursue marriage therapy. With their EAP, your agency can have a Peer Support Program. Have faith in the process. In the near term, medication might be helpful. There are several possibilities available. There are also a lot of free information available from The Concerns of Police Survivors.
Received Assistance
To Help: I’m delighted you were able to get support, and I’m delighted you’re still here to offer these fantastic resources and words of encouragement. I’m grateful.
Stories by
R. Eric Thomas
-
Asking Eric: Book clubbers tired of tirades issuing from one grumpy member
-
Asking Eric: When 20-something sons hint at wanting to move back home, it s time to set up some rules
-
Asking Eric: After 6 years of silence, ex friend s out-of-the-blue blanket apologies fall flat
For inquiries, contact R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or by mail at P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Subscribe to his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com and follow him on Instagram.
